Postal Brain Damaged: Cruel Dude Thesis Walkthrough

Poster #1: Cruel Dude Thesis / Poster #2: Tesloborgelion

The level starts in an elevator that takes you down to a room with every weapon you have found during the game. There is also a Quick Pillz here; take it, as it makes the first phase much easier.

Turn around to face the elevator you came down in. There is a poster on each side of it. Grab both before you move on to the fight.

Boss Phase 1: The Other Dude

Leon Dusk turns out to be The Other Dude who has been tormenting you in your dreams, and you fight him in person first. He moves and fights just like the Postal Dude.

Phase 1 Attacks

• Sliding and kicking: he slides and jumps nonstop, which makes him hard to hit, and kicks you if you get too close.
• Shotgun blast: very deadly at close range. He fires quickly and likes to slide right up to you for a point-blank shot.
• Machine gun: fast and accurate bullets that do little damage each. He uses it in short bursts after a big hit, or to wear your health down.
• Rocket launcher: easy to avoid from a distance, but dangerous when he fires point blank. He does not seem to take damage from his own rockets.

Phase 1 Tips

Slow or precise weapons like the rocket launcher and shotgun are hard to land while he slides around. Weapons that track targets work better, such as the Not-So-Smart Pistol MK420 or the Gun Goes Brr minigun once its tracker is on him. The Pu55y Blower can also do well.

Keep sliding and moving yourself so you are never an easy target. You can parry his shotgun pellets and bullets, but he can dodge the parried shots and you are left wide open, so it is rarely worth it.

The easiest approach is the Quick Pillz from the weapon room. Use it the moment he jumps into the arena, walk up to him and fire a few point-blank shotgun blasts while time is slowed. Each one takes a big chunk of his health. Do not activate Double Akimbo while Quick Pillz is running, as it cancels the slow-motion effect.

Poster #3: The Other Dude

This poster is on the wall directly below the robot. It is still there after the second phase, but the best time to grab it is right after you beat phase 1. Quicksave once you have it, because phase 2 is much deadlier.

Boss Phase 2: Teslaborgelion

The Other Dude climbs into the Teslaborgelion suit that has been standing at the back of the arena. It is bigger and slower than he was, but far more dangerous.

Phase 2 Attacks

• Shockwave stomps: every jump or stomp sends a shockwave across the arena. Jump over it, and watch for a second stomp straight after a jump.
• Rocket barrage: when you stay far away, it fires rockets into the air. Yellow circles on the floor show where they will land, so step out of them.
• Gatling gun: after spinning up the gun on its right arm, it fires a tracking stream of bullets that kills fast. Keep sliding sideways to stay ahead of it.
• Scissor attack: it stands up straight for a moment, then crouches and slides at you with its scissor claw. This hits very hard and is almost impossible to dodge up close. The three launch pads in the middle of the arena let you jump over it.

Phase 2 Tips

The robot has grapple rings on its armour plates. Use the Super Hooker Shotgun to rip the plates off and expose the green circuits underneath; those are where your damage counts. Pulling off the groin plate and peeing on it unlocks an achievement and removes a big chunk of health.

Stay close to the launch pads in the middle so you can escape the scissor attack, but never use them while the gatling gun is spinning up, or you will be shot out of the air.

Back to the Episode 3: No-Life Matters walkthrough for the other levels in this episode.